Cry Me a River for K-Fed

via The Bosh

Is it wrong to mix Justin Timberlake metaphors with the post-Britney fate of Kevin Ferderline? I think not, given how much the wigga twins have in common.

Britney Spears and Federline have reached a final divorce settlement, and Kevin is reportedly walking away with only $1 million of Britney’s estimated $100 million in loot, thanks to an airtight prenuptial agreement. That’s a tad less than the $19 million that some had speculated about earlier.

I don’t feel all that bad for Kevin. Sure, he has no reasonable expectation of a career, but he did get to hook up with Britney when she was the hottest thing on the planet, his DNA has won the Louisiana Powerball Lottery, and he smoked at least $2.3 million worth of the finest bud in the world over the last two years. To top it off, once the pop princess became a bald baby momma, he leaves with seven figures. Perfect execution.

Twenty years from now, a toothless Ferderline will be sitting in a dilapidated double wide, laughing his ass off at what he got away with. OK, this will likely happen next year, but it’s still better than most white trash stories outside of Britney’s own.

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