~ Paris Hilton ~

A judge may rule that Paris Hilton has to go back to jail. When the news broke yesterday about Paris being released from jail, LA city attorney and American hero Rocky Delgadillo called “bullshit” (shortly after I did, thank you) by filing a motion to have Paris sent back to the slammer. In the documents [...]

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Paris Hilton’s shrink got her out of the clink because he said she was “fragile.” OK, let me clarify: It’s not that Paris Hilton doesn’t have herpes, it’s just that she was released from prison early due to psychological, not physical, problems. Psychiatrist Charles Sophy visited Hilton in jail yesterday and the day before. We’re [...]

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Paris Hilton is already out of jail. Well, it didn’t take long for the wonky eye of evil to do its dirty work and allow Paris Hilton to convince the L.A. County Sheriff’s Department to set her free after only 3 days. Authorities are citing “medical reasons” but won’t go into detail as to what [...]

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Sarah Silverman made fun of Paris at the 2007 MTV Movie Awards. Paris Hilton made a couple of surprise moves yesterday. First, she showed up at the MTV Movie Awards and allowed everyone to ridicule her. Then, afterwards, she checked herself into jail ahead of her June 5 deadline, doing an end around the legions [...]

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Paris Hilton will be electronically tagged in jail so she doesn’t get physically tagged. Paris Hilton will be tagged when she arrives at jail, and I’m not talking about just in the showers. She’ll be wearing an electronic device for her own safety. The hotel heiress will be provided with a panic device giving her [...]

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Yep, 23 days in jail will be rough for Paris Hilton Amazing. Paris Hilton has had her 45 day jail sentence cut to 23 days because she actually showed up to be sentenced. And they wonder why people think the United States legal system is screwed? Her sentence was shortened after jail officials gave her [...]

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Don’t worry—Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger has a killer security plan for Aug. 29, 1997. The Governator, Arnold Schwarzenegger, has too many things on his plate to worry about Paris Hilton and her recent prison sentence, despite the fact that Paris made an appeal asking for a pardon. The appeal, which is a truly remarkable piece of [...]

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Paris Hilton falls for that one every time, despite her lawyers’ warnings I’m not talking about her amateur porn career, either. Apparently, L.A. County jails are so overcrowded that large numbers of inmates are currently serving less than half of their sentences. Gee, didn’t see that one coming! Of course, this means that Paris Hilton [...]

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