It all makes sense now. Paris Hilton’s new rack is a direct attempt to circumvent justice, as Los Angeles city prosecutors plan to have her probation revoked and seek jail time for the heiress.
“We’re confident we have sufficient evidence to prove that her license was suspended and that she had knowledge of that suspension,” said Nick Velasquez, a spokesman for the city attorney’s office. Hilton could face up to 90 days in jail if a judge finds she violated her probation, Velasquez said.
Now, let’s take a look at the timeline:
- January: Paris pleads no contest to alcohol-related reckless driving stemming from a Sept. 7 arrest in Hollywood.
- February: Paris pulled over on Sunset Boulevard and ticketed for misdemeanor driving with a suspended license.
- March: Paris experiences massive increase in cup size.
It’s common knowledge that if Paris is moving her lips, she’s either lying or disparaging a minority group. But her new boobs guarantee that no one will be looking at her mouth, much less listening to her spew, in court.
Prediction: Paris gets off, along with the judge and prosecuting attorney.
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