An orangutan with a tape measure is Enrique Iglesias’ worst nightmare.In my never-ending quest to bring you the finest quality journalism around, I offer this celebrity penis report. Rather than discuss Milton Berle’s legendarily large johnson, let’s take a look at the opposite end of the size spectrum. So grab your tweezers and magnifying glass, and let’s go.
First, we have Enrique Iglesias, who is not shy about his tiny member:
His dad Julio, 63, is a legendary lover said to have bedded 3,000 women. But Enrique told a mag: “I’d change my penis if I could. It’s way, way, way too small.â€
Next up, legendary geriatric rocker Mick Jagger once tried to pump his penis up using an ancient Peruvian technique.
“It involved putting bamboo over the male member and filling it with stinger bees so the member attained the size of the bamboo. Mick spent months in the jungle in Peru. He was going mad out there I think.”
Last week one of the star’s old flames, Janice Dickinson, told Jonathan Ross that the singer has “a very small penis.”
There you have it people. It turns out fame is not only hard to achieve, it’s also not a sufficient compensating factor for those with small peens. Luckily, a new Corvette is still only $44,995 at a Chevy dealership near you.